You pay for what you get

Isn’t this what AOL did back in the day when they were the ISP, like, 10 years ago?

Everyone had AOL when I was in 7th and 8th grade, and real, postal email boxes were always filled with CDs boasting “1500 hours of AOL-FREE!” AOL and Time Warner merged in 2000, but Time Warner apparently forgot to get their facts straight and thinks they have this groundbreaking internet billing system based on usage. Yes, paying for what you use is a truly innovative idea. What’s next in technological advances, rotary cell phones?

Maybe they’re trying to appeal to older people who are less likely to use the internet, like my grandmother who loves her pre-paid cell phone. Or they could be trying to cut down usage. You know, like how you put on a sweater when you have to pay for heat?

Most likely, they’re looking for a way to make more money. ‘Cuz for every Scrooge who turns off all the lights the second they leave a room, there are a couple hundred colege kids who are online 24-7, guzzling more bandwidth than beer.

Unless the internet suddenly became another precious resource we’re wasting, Time Warner is trying to cash in on the round-the-clock internet addiction that social networks have elevated to an art. AIM made us want to stay online all night so everyone could see what we were doing; social networks made us want to stay awake and see what everyone else was doing too.

Even bad sex sells